Updates from Far, Far Away

OK, so maybe not THAT far away.

Things are actually going really well. I'm enjoying my visit with my family. Everything is coming together and even when stress hits I can deal with it easily. I love the Christmas season, it doesn't let much negativity penetrate it.

The services, I'm told, were nice. A true celebration of a life well lived. They're now going to put together an extended famiy tree. We solved lingering worries about land we own and took care of arranging to pay for property taxes from afar. There's a possibility an orphanage will be built on it, and we'll help.

Through the clutter of going through the treasures of another's life, there were so many discoveries. Report cards from hubby's father's high school. Pictures, lots of pictures. So many things to be thankful for, so many memories. For the first time, the hubby got to really speak with someone who knew his father as a friend, they were like brothers growing up. He got to hear stories of his father's childhood, because Gran wasn't permitted to speak of him (to ease Gramp's pain). Gran lived a full, loving life, and was selfless to the end. She truly set the example of a spiritual leader for this family.

Plans for our vacation have changed to include other family members. While I think the trip will now be more tiring, it will be wholly more satisfying. And while we have managed to stay within our budget for Christmas this year, I daresay we'll have to ship some of the presents back. I don't think they'll all fit in the car.

I got my nails done and did some girly-girl shopping today with my mom and my sister, coming home with a few small treasured items. Mom's manicurist even gave us all matching stars on our ring fingers for Christmas, and painted my daughter's nails red in the spirit of the season.

I feel contented, at rest, incredibly happy.

I love Christmas.

Impatient

I'm at a standstill. Everything's packed. The dishes are washed. Occasionally I have to feed a child, so those dishes get washed immediately. The laundry is done and put away. The house is straight, and the kids have been okay today about picking up after themselves.

But that's because I have a great threat. We won't go to Grandma's if they don't. Works every time.

Bryan's grandmother passed away Sunday morning. We're awaiting the funeral date so we can make plans. There's still the possibility that it will be tomorrow, which is why everything's packed and ready to go. We're literally living out of our suitcases in our own home, waiting to hear whether or not we need to drive to Arkansas tonight.

I'm stressed, but I know it will pass. I'm making my list and checking it twice, but it has nothing to do with who's been naughty or nice. It's got the words "socks" and "adjust thermostat" on it. Most things are crossed off, but some can't be done until we know.

So, say a prayer for my sanity as I try to keep up with the house until we know when our two-week trip will begin.

Thank God for bereavement leave, since otherwise we would be in quite a pickle.

Glutton for Punishment

For some reason Houston has an inability to succumb to winter. Today I wore a light jacket over a sleeveless shirt and had to take the jacket off so I wouldn't suffocate in my car.

I'm winding down. I've got my toffee cappuccino in my Power of Pink cup, having just e-mailed out the conference call notes on our current promotions for my team members. I just get all riled up about this company. I love what I do. I wish everyone had the ability to make the amount of money I can make while loving what they do as much as I do. But I think I might have talked too fast for anyone to understand what I was saying. Such is the nature of excitement, eh?

The gym membership is going well. I had my first torture session with a personal trainer on Monday. Even though I was miserable with a cold, he still wasn't nice to me. My arms and shoulders are still sore. Nevertheless, knowing I wouldn't be able to make it in today, I went to the gym last night after putting the kids to bed. I worked my abs and legs. Now, at least, the pain is evenly spread over the entire body. I went again yesterday, even though I'm still feeling relatively cruddy, because I felt better after working out on Monday. I felt better, again, after working out last night. I think I'm catching on to this whole "health" thing. Ha.

I really liked my personal trainer. His name is Kennis, and he's probably too young for me to be comfortable dating my younger sister, if that gives you any idea of his age. But he's personable and encouraging. I swear I've never been high-fived by one person so many times in my life. Plus, he gives me direction where I have none. He knows what to do, and I'm as lost as tofu in gumbo in that gym, lovely as it is.

My husband remarked that there was something terribly wrong. He should have been the last person I ever told I was comfortable with my personal trainer, not the first. Boy, do I have a lot to learn about gyms. ;)

For now, personal training is not fiscally possible. I've decided that if we can get three credit cards paid off we can get them back. Sounds like yet another goal in this princess's world. As if that's anything new!!!






Please say a prayer for us. We're in a sticky situation with relatives who are very ill, and our lack of sick leave and/or vacation days. Timing is everything, and this time we need it to work in our favor so we can be where we are needed. Thanks in advance.

Happy trails to you, until we meet again...

Impulse

I think I've lost my marbles. Gone temporarily insane. I don't know why I did it. It just felt right at the time. Now I'm thinking... Oh, crap. I've gotta tell my husband when he gets home.

So what's this horrible deed I've done? I've joined a gym. Yup, I sold out. I've been wanting to join one for a long time, but it's never been a priority. I went today to deliver a catalog to a customer that works at the new gym near our house, and ended up touring the gym. They gave me a deal that's half the price of the other gyms I've looked at. That's probably because they're new and they're trying to get people in the door. Nevertheless, it's a locked-in unbeatable rate with free child care and free classes. Tai Chi, yoga, pilates, kickboxing, latin dancing, here I come!

Yes, that's right. I said free child care. Quit getting off the subject.

I know you're jealous. It was part of the deal to get me to sign. And it was worth it. I have my first appointment with a personal trainer on Monday. They promised me that if I showed up three times a week I'd reach my target body by March.

Yay!

So... for all you jealous people, I can give each of you a free one-week pass to try it out. And maybe, since I'm also their new Mary Kay rep, I can get you the same deal I got.

Oh, yeah. That's another bonus. Since they're so new, they said I could put a flier in every new guest welcome packet, leave cleanser samples by the sinks, and set up a table on Customer Appreciation Days.

Bonus.

Now comes the hard part. Convincing my anti-gym husband not only that it was a good idea, but that he wants to work out with me. You see, I envisioned this great idea of him meeting me there after work, since it's on his way home. It would still be before much of the after-work crowd since he gets off work at 4:00. We can toss the kiddos in child care and go work out together. Cardio, weights, the sauna. Then pool laps followed by the hot tub. Yeah, baby.

So... pray that he's open to the idea. He's been squeamish about working out in front of others. I'm ready to deal with it if he is. We have until Monday to get our money back, but I'm thinking even if he refuses I'll still go.

'Cause who can beat free child care???

Tough

It just seems like there is a bit of melancholy everywhere. Today at church I spoke with quite a few people. Everyone's going through something, including us. There were some people whose problems made my problems look so insignificant. I guess it's a healthy dose of perspective, but it still breaks my heart that people I know and love are going through these kinds of things.

So many things being lost... relatives, unborn children, houses... Things that make you want to jump out and help, but there is absolutely nothing you can do. It leaves you feeling so helpless and incompetent.

Which led to thoughts about finances. Ours in particular, but in general as well. I consider myself to be quite good at manipulating the checkbook to work to our best advantage, but the things I don't have control over keep catching up to us. Another way I'm left feeling helpless. Sometimes I have to just throw up my hands and say... "Well, I don't know what we're going to do." We're a not-so-proud member of the paycheck-to-paycheck club. What worries me is... what happens if something happens?

This is not just a concern for myself, but for my entire generation and the next. We're products of the immediate gratification generation. Don't end up where your parents are, start there. Don't wait on that big-screen, buy it now, with no interest for twleve months! What they don't tell you is that if you don't pay it off they backcharge you interest and then you end up paying twice (or more) what you would have if you'd have just paid it off.

Our entire nation is on a paycheck-to-paycheck basis. How scary is that? Especially with all the layoffs going on! What happens if something happens? A layoff, then immediate bankruptcy because you drown in the debt of things you didn't need but couldn't wait for. It terrifies me what would happen if Bryan lost his job.

So we're inching our way out of this hole. And the devil doesn't like it. He likes for us to live in fear, to not have a safety net. To suffer for years upon years for mistakes we made that we are trying to correct. Because every time we move forward a step, something happens and we're forced back two. I'm sad to say that we didn't meet any of our financial goals this year. Instead, we're worse off now than we were in January. Not because we were silly, but because of CRAP that kept happening. Total and utter crap. Senseless, uncontrollable crap, and that's the worst kind.

What can be done? Nothing, really. Keep trudging along. I know our perserverance will be rewarded. I know our sound financial decisions will be rewarded. I know if we can keep putting one foot in front of the other, eventually we will be free.

And if you want to send a Christmas gift, make it a payment to our credit cards. ;)