For all those who have been patiently waiting... no, I'm not a Director yet.
Tuesday dawned with chaos. I had two days to get 17 people to place orders. Ha. The kids were monsters, tearing up everything in sight, screaming at each other, breaking things, hitting, biting, you name it. My Director came over so we could hash out the situation. It was raining like cats and dogs.
We sat and pondered, wrote a plan of action, rewrote it ten times, looked at it from 40 different angles, and tried starting from scratch and doing it all over again. I used almost half of my notebook trying to figure it out. While I was working it all out with my Director, my heart was crying to God... What should I do?!
After four hours of crunching numbers, I made an executive decision to resubmit for qualification in June. The numbers simply didn't come together. It was a classic case of choosing to build my house on rock instead of sand.
As soon as the decision was made, instant peace came over me. My blood pressure returned to normal. My panic, anxiety, stress, and headache all calmed into simple exhaustion. Baby girl finally settled down to watch a movie, and Little Wookie laid down for a three-hour nap. I knew it was the right answer, and that I had listened to what God wanted me to do. Even the rain let up to a light drizzle. I basked in the calm after the storm.
I'm beginning again with a stronger unit. I'm starting with 16 instead of 8. I've got 9 people ready to come on this month. All I've got to worry about it is the production.
My Director, the sweetheart that she is, cleaned my kitchen for me. I laid down for a short nap, and noticed that in the chaos the kids had thrown my precious Bible, a gift from my hubby a few Christmases ago, onto the bed. I gingerly picked it up, being careful not to tear the thin pages. I needed a word from God right then. I remembered that the last time I did a Bible study, we were engrossed in the book of Phillipians. I remember general ideas, but thought it would be a great read again. I flipped it open and my eyes immediately landed on Phillipians 1:4-6. (emphasis mine)
In all my prayers for you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident in this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Getting goosebumps, I knew God had spoken directly to me through His word. I tried to read more, but couldn't retain it.
I had already received my message.
01 June 2006
Weathering the Storm
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4 comments:
God usually has to hit me between the eyes with a two-by-four...I'm glad your reaffirmation from Him was a quiet, heart-felt joy...
Jen you are the epitome of grace under pressure. I'm proud of you and I know you're going to achieve all your dreams. In due course. Hugs!
I went to bible school about a hundred years ago (actually, it was '96..) and we did a study on Philipians. We talked about defining JOY and had a great discussion on it. We tossed around the standard "Jesus Others and You", but then we got some more meat... I came away with this: Joy is not the absence of pain, but rather the presence of God". My salvation has been a "worldly" frustration and, quite literally, my saving grace. I am unbalanced on a good day, but I believe that the stone rolled away. I think I may go look at Philippians myself. Thanks :)
That's awesome Jen. I am encouraged just reading this.
oh, I met this kid from S.land (isn’t that near you) on my trip to Fl. He was with his church Bridge Fellowship. When he told me where he was from I immediately thought of you :)
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